A mistake each, at a weekly meal

The activity

Once a week, at one meal, everyone says one thing they got wrong, starting with you. Nobody comments on anyone else’s.

What it is for. In our experience, a child who fears mistakes is helped more by hearing adults make them, calmly and often, than by being told mistakes do not matter.

• The first step. Explain it once, and keep it light: “Every week at this meal, we’re each going to say one thing we got wrong.”

When to get help. If her fear of getting things wrong is stopping her from starting work, sleeping, or going to school, or her mood has been low for several weeks, talk to her school and your GP. The routes under “If you need help right now”, at the foot of every page, are for when it cannot wait.

The other four steps, and your part in it, are in the library.

It goes with

• Perfectionism. For parents whose child can’t bear to get anything wrong.
• The 11+ Year. For parents whose child is preparing for school entrance exams.

The first chapter you open here is free to read in full.

Free on this subject

• Perfectionism. What to do first, what helps, and who else can help. Free to read and to print.
• Self-esteem. What to do first, what helps, and who else can help. Free to read and to print.