Anxiety

Where to start

For almost everything, the NHS is the right first move, and it costs nothing.

• Your GP. The gateway to everything the NHS offers a child: paediatric assessment, a referral to CAMHS, and support for you as the parent. Ask for a double appointment. Describe the pattern over weeks rather than the worst single day, and say plainly what you are worried about. Bring a written list; the ten minutes go quickly. www.nhs.uk/service-search/find-a-gp
• NHS 111, and Lifeline in Northern Ireland. The mental health crisis line for your area. Free, confidential and answered twenty-four hours a day, every day of the year. When you or your child is in mental health crisis and it will not wait for a GP appointment. England, Scotland and Wales: call 111 and choose the mental-health optionNorthern Ireland: call Lifeline on 0808 808 8000
• NHS Talking Therapies. Free NHS therapy for adults in England, for anxiety and low mood. You can refer yourself; you do not need to go through your GP first. For the parent. A great many of the parents we sit with are carrying something of their own, and waiting for someone to ask. www.nhs.uk/service-search/mental-health/find-an-NHS-talking-therapies-service
• Your child’s school. The pastoral lead, the head of year, or the form tutor. Free, already knows your child, and often the quickest way to get something changed at school. Before or alongside anything else. A school cannot act on what it has not been told, and what you bring is often what it did not have.

For anxiety

• YoungMinds. The UK’s young people’s mental health charity, with a free Parents Helpline, webchat and email, and a plain A to Z of the things parents worry about. When you want to talk through a worry about your child with someone who has heard it before, or read a clear first explanation of a named concern. Not a crisis line. Parents Helpline 0808 802 5544 · Mon, Thu, Fri 9.30am-4pm; Tue, Wed 9.30am-6pm · Webchat Mon-Fri 9.30am-4pm; email parents@youngminds.org.uk · Outside those hours the parents line is closed. The urgent routes on this page are open when it is not. www.youngminds.org.uk/parent/parents-helpline
• NHS: mental health advice for parents and carers. The NHS’s pages for parents, in one place: anxiety, low mood, anger, bereavement, arguments with teenagers, exam stress, and how to talk about feelings. When you want the NHS’s own account before anyone else’s. www.nhs.uk/mental-health/children-and-young-adults/advice-for-parents
• Place2Be. Parenting Smart, written by the child mental health specialists who work in primary schools: short, practical articles and films on friendships, behaviour, worries and routines. For a child of five to eleven, when you want something you can read in ten minutes and try tonight. Place2Be’s counselling itself is only through partner schools. parentingsmart.place2be.org.uk
• Kooth. Free, anonymous online support for young people, commissioned by the NHS in many areas: articles, moderated forums and drop-in text chat with a qualified practitioner. For a teenager who will not talk to you but might talk to someone. Whether it is available depends on where you live; they check at sign-up. Whether it is available where you live depends on your local authority, so it is worth checking first. explore.kooth.com/families
• Anxiety UK. A national charity whose single subject is anxiety, with free downloadable guides on helping an anxious child. For reading written by people who do only this. There is no free helpline to ring; the number is a recorded information line. The number is a recorded information line, not a person. Charged at your standard call rate, not free. Anxiety UK self-care infoline 03444 775 774 · 24/7 recorded self-care information www.anxietyuk.org.uk/get-help/helping-your-child

If your child is self-harming, or has spoken about not wanting to be here

• Sift (formerly Self-Injury Support). The UK’s self-harm charity. A free evening listening service by phone, text or email for anyone affected by self-harm, including parents, plus a guide written for family members. When you have found a mark and need to talk to someone who has had this conversation many times. Evenings only; outside those hours use the numbers at the top of this sheet. This service has limited helpline hours. Outside those hours, use the numbers at the top of this sheet. Sift listening support 0808 800 8088 · Phone Mon, Tue and Thu 6pm-9pm; text Mon-Fri 6pm-9pm; email answered within a week · Outside those hours the phone line is closed. The urgent routes on this page are open when it is not. sift.org.uk/get-help/listening-support-services
• Alumina (online self-harm support for 10 to 17s). Free seven-week online support groups for ten to seventeen year olds who self-harm, small and anonymous, led by trained practitioners. Your child signs up themselves; under-fourteens need your permission. For a young person who will not talk to you but might talk in a group of people their age. Not for a crisis. For the young person. Not a crisis service. www.selfharm.co.uk

If it looks like OCD, or panic

• OCD Action. The UK’s OCD charity. A helpline and email service for people with OCD and their families, online support groups including ones for parents and carers, and a moderated forum. When the rituals and the reassurance-seeking have started to run the house. Standard call rate. Charged at your standard call rate, not free. OCD Action helpline 020 7253 5272 · Mon-Fri 9.30am-8pm; answerphone and call-back when not answered live ocdaction.org.uk/i-need-support
• OCD-UK. Free online workshops for parents of a child with OCD, plus support groups and a forum run by people who have lived with it. When you want to learn how to respond to OCD at home rather than feed it. Information and peer support, not treatment. Email Mon-Fri www.ocduk.org
• No Panic. A helpline for anxiety, panic attacks and phobias, open every day until ten at night, with a youth service by email. When panic is the shape the anxiety takes. Standard call rate. Charged at your standard call rate, not free. No Panic helpline 0300 772 9844 · Every day 10am-10pm · Youth service by email, youth@nopanic.org.uk; 24-hour recorded crisis message on 01952 680835 nopanic.org.uk

If you are considering private therapy

Waiting lists are long. If you can meet the cost, a registered therapist can usually be seen in weeks rather than months. Both registers below are accredited by the Professional Standards Authority, which is the thing to check before anything else.

• BACP Therapist Directory. The British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy’s public register. Search by area, by what you are bringing, and by whether the therapist works with children. www.bacp.co.uk/search/Therapists
• NCPS Therapist Directory. The National Counselling and Psychotherapy Society’s register. Every therapist listed is qualified, supervised, insured, and accountable to a code of ethics. ncps.com/find-a-counsellor
• Kensington Square Therapy. Our own practice. We work with children, young people and parents, in person in London, online, and inside schools we partner with. www.kst.ltd

What to look for in a therapist, what a first session is like, and the questions worth asking before you commit, are set out at theparentbook.com/finding-a-therapist

Everything else

The full directory, across every subject, is at theparentbook.com/services. If a number here has changed, please tell us at hello@theparentbook.com and we will correct it.